19

Some point before the age of seven, I made a promise to myself. At this time, I  thought the career as princess was possible and most of my friends were imaginary, but my promise was that by age 19 all would be well. I would have it together. I don't know what I thought "together" was at that age, but I was pretty sure that things would be falling into place for me. I wouldn't have any big questions lingering over my head. I wouldn't be a child any longer. I might even have a job or at least a direction. I'd be settled. I might even have a boyfriend. Considering at nearly age seven, I already had one. His name was Tim and he was a pizza delivery boy. I thought that was a pretty glamorous job at that age. What could be so bad about driving around in your own car delivering pizza? That's assuming you get to eat some of that pizza though. & yes, Tim only existed in my head. I'm pretty sure that Tim was 19. In my head, I was 16 and I had a twin sister named Tiffani. My favorite name at the time. My mom wouldn't let me change my name, so my twin would just have to do. It was the 80s after all. Don't worry, I no longer crave a name change!

By my 20th year, I was pretty disappointed in life. I deferred college for a year. I was working at my hometown library and even though I was highly thought of and everyone knew me, I certainly didn't feel together. My life had barely begun. I was making minimum wage, but I was doing a job that I liked a whole lot. Cute boys checked out books. Cute boys told me about their girlfriends. I kept my chin up and my 20th year faded into my 21st. It didn't really matter much that 19 was a total bust. There was something about that number.

You know how some people have a favorite number? 19 became mine. It didn't make much sense to me why I chose this random number as a kid, but it stuck with me. Nine was a pretty important number for me. My birthday is in September on the 9th day and if you multiply 9x9 you get the year I was born. That also happened to be the year Lady Diana became Princess Diana. I sort of always thought of her as my namesake, and maybe I never got over my princess phase. I even ended up dating a few boys with birthdays on the 19th. All a coincidence, honest! I guess that's why I thought it was so important for my wedding day to be the 19th and yeah, it was in September. And it was in a pizza joint. It all came full circle!

I guess it's my lucky number. 19. 9. Something. Even my husband's birthday (10/9) just happened to be exactly one month after mine. I'm happy to say that's where the coincidences stop. Or fate. Or whatever you call it. I certainly didn't choose it. It just sort of happened that way.